Tonight I found myself at your grave again. As I arrived it was lightly raining. I had no umbrella, but it really did not matter to me. As I sat next to your grave I poured my heart out to the Lord about how much I was missing you. About how I needed his help. Help to know how to do this life with your absence. Help for my broken heart. Help in ways I am unaware I need. I told Him about how I long to see you. To see Him. To hold you. I told the Lord again what a gift it was to be your mom. And then as I ran my fingers through the flowers on your gravestone, I closed my eyes and quoted Job from my heart saying, "The Lord gives....and the Lord takes away....blessed be the name of the Lord. I love you Lord."
And as I opened my eyes and looked up I saw this...
And when I turned around I saw this...
I cried and laughed and cried and worshipped the Lord in the middle of the cemetary. As the rainbow was fading and the glorious sunset was overtaken by dark rain clouds I stood and sang this...
I had this version on my phone.
Thank you Lord for your mercy. Thank you for your faithfulness. Thank you for making it so very obvious that you will "never leave me nor forsake me" and that you truly are an ever present help in our time of need.
Blessed be the name of the Lord. Forever and Ever.
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