Never Want to Leave You

Last night, driving home from volleyball practice Lizzy said, "Mom, I have this faint memory of crying and being really sad the first time I met Daniel."

Right away, the photos that will follow came to my mind.  Like all of the big kids, Lizzy was so excited to meet Daniel...

But unlike the rest of my big kids, Lizzy completely broke down when she had to go home again.  So we talked about this last night.  I told her how she "never wanted to leave Daniel" and she could not understand why Daniel and I had to stay behind.  Oh my goodness she was so sad.  I made a picture video that captured Daniel's first few weeks and in that video I put a few of these photos.  Lizzy was 4 at the time, but after watching the video anytime she heard the song I had used for it, she would start to cry.  One time she was even sleeping in the car when the familiar David Crowder tune began to play, and in her sleep she cried out.  

They had such a deep connection.  Lizzy sang to my belly every day of my pregnancy.  And so once she met this little guy, she did not want to leave him...Ever...

On Friday, April 1st 2016, I am sure if there had been a photographer in the room, I would have looked much like this.  The single hardest part of Daniel dying was leaving his body behind at Children's Hospital.  It went against every motherly instinct in my body.  I never wanted to leave you either dear Daniel.  We all love you so.